Thursday, June 4, 2009

"What if..."

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Author: Uncle Charlie, Zambey | Filed Under: |
Been thinking about this today...

I have come to realize that women live by the "WHAT IF" motto...What I mean by this is that women will ride or die with a guy even though she knows deep down in her heart of hearts that he is not going to come around and be the man that she wants him to be. Women, the problem with the "what if" motto, is that you are wishing and reaching for something that is not there a lot of the times. I know what goes through your mind - "if I do this he will come around," or "if I change this then I know this will get him to love me." And my personal favorite, "if I stay around him long enough he will see that I am the one for him." WRONG!!!! Sorry boo boo it doesn't work like that.

Unlike you ladies, men know what they want and will go after it. If you are not it we will either tell you or our actions will show it. Ladies I think you see what you want to see. Here's an example: Let's say I tell you that we are just friends and that I really enjoy your company and want to go out and kick it. Maybe grab dinner, drinks and movies. In a man's mind that is what it is a night out with my homie, but for a woman she thinks if we do this a few more times, he will come around and feel what i feel, I will play it cool.

Ladies, would you really want to be with someone that you are forcing to be with you, wouldn't you want someone that wants you and pursues you. I know I wouldn't want a woman that I had to con into loving me. I would be doing myself a disservice. The "WHAT IF" thinking just leads you to getting your feelings hurt, you having sleepless nights, and self esteem issues where you start seconding guessing yourself.

Ladies take control of your situation, stop dreaming see the reality of it and make conscience decisions and move on, find that man that wants you, the way you want you need and desire to be wanted.

Written by, Bobby Drake

1 comments:

Former What if... said...

You made some good points Bobby but I do have a few disagreements.
There are many women who live by the “what if..."motto. However, I don't think it's as easy as you may think it is to let go of something that you feel deep inside is real.
You say a guy will show/tell you how he feels through his action or words but what happens when they are conflicting? Example: Dude says, “I’m just not ready for a girlfriend" then turns around and says, "I would consider you for a girlfriend." WTF is that....confusion is what I call it. Make up your mind. Don't tell me you're not ready one min then tell me in another that I'm a possible.
I don't see it as the woman forcing him to be with her. Apparently there is something in her that he likes and wants to keep around and if they are friends (Homies, as you put it) then he should know that that's not even her style. It's got to be mutual. He is giving her something she needs and she is giving him something he needs.
You are right, women do need to take control of the situation but I don't think they’re always dreaming. If a man is not consistent in his actions/words, that opens the door for the "what if...” So, my suggestion to the men out there is to stay consistent. If she’s not what you want or need treat her like one of your male Homies. Don’t give in to the things she wants or things that will make her happy for the moment because in the end it’s only going to lead to heartache and possible loss of a really good friend. Then you’ll be asking yourself “what if…”

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Zambey Local launched January 10th 2009 as a tool for local business to connect with customers all over the country. Zambey Local is easy to use and set up as a directory- NOT a search engine. Our goal is to help both the consumer and business owner. "Go Zambey, Or Stay Home." King James Approximately blog was created to express our opinion about sports and how business and society effect this industry. The author of these blogs is Uncle Charlie. Uncle Charlie is a motivated and gifted writer we feel has the unique ability to create "buzz." KJA will cover many topics across all sports both men and women. We look forward to your comments and feed back. Zambey's Smokin' Hot-singles blog will focus on the hottest men and women from around the country via video blogs. We’re interested in what you have to say about love and relationships. If you think you have what it takes to be one of Zambey’s Smokin’ Hot singles, we can't wait to hear from you. Uncle Charlie and Zambey look forward to this journey and insightful look into sports and relationships together. Find us on myspace at www.myspace.com/zambeylocal

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